Water Choir
by NewJesus
Summary: After a hard and dreadful school day, a shower is just what Jaune needs to get in touch with himself. For meditation, self reflection, and sometimes old melodies just happens to pop up. And when no ones around...


Jaune had been the last to fight in today's combat class, and dear Oum did he make a mess

Nora had insisted he had to equip himself with some of her dust, because "When you only fight with a sword you have to pack a little extra punch." Jaune had no idea what she had mixed together, so naturally he had some doubts about it, but when Nora insist there is little else to do but to follow. After an hour of watching his friends kicking each other's asses in the most incredible fashions, it was finally his turn. He was up against Cardin, again

He did better than when he first came to Beacon, but not that much better, and he would not forgive himself losing to him again. It was not the thought of Cardin winning that was the problem anymore, but the thought of meeting his team afterwards. To watch the pettiness in their faces. Pyrrha's sadness disguised with a horrible act of optimism and a hope for a better next time. No, not again. It had already happened too many times, and today was to be the day he turned it around. Suddenly, Jaune felt the dust weight in his pocket, and a new idea sprung to him. Perhaps this could give him the strategic advantage he needed. Perhaps Brain could win over brawn!

Of course it couldn't, and now the whole place was one giant mess! Cardin had been impatient, so just before the start, when Jaune was readying the dust container, while Glynda was counting down, he had abruptly charged forward. Starting ahead in a manner most ungentlemanly

The consequences was catastrophical

The whole arena was one great hole afterwards. The match was cancelled. Nobody won. Cardin was sent to see Glynda afterwards, but Jaune was also punished for the use of dust which he had no ability to control, and was set to clean up the arena. Ren joined him afterwards as a sort of apology for what Nora was partly responsible for causing

After the arena started to look decent, Ren said Jaune could just go ahead, and he would finish. Normally Jaune was the type of person that would never let a friend be left alone with the work, but today he was just too tired to pass his offer

* * *

Jaune quickly undressed himself in the large open locker room, and then headed for the showers that in contrast were divided into small singular booths. It was a nice change from his former school years to have a bit of privacy for his... privates

He entered the small cabin, and placed himself directly under the fountainhead. Since it was freshly used from all the former sweaty fighters, there would be no cold water to let directly down into the sewers first. Soon the hot water poured down on his shoulders, washing away the dirt, and somehow also his troubles. As he had gotten older, Jaune had found the shower as a way to enter an almost meditative state, where he could follow the stream of his thoughts more intensely, while the warmth washed his body. He closed his eyes, and went over the highlights of the day, it was over quickly, nothing much to reflect upon there. He thought about Cardin, then not just Cardin, but all the bullies in his life. Why some people just took the differences in others as weakness to look down on and humiliate. Then he thought about Pyrrha, and briefly considered the possibly of faith.

Then there was a forest, a big forest, a big green forest dashed in the warm rays of the midday sun. He was a child again. He relived memories of his childhood, good and bad- but then- out of nowhere began a tapping in the back of his head. He did his best to ignore it, and continued to reflect on his life, but like a woodpecker, it keep hacking on the inside. Jaune looked down on his feet to see they had begun to imitate the rhythm. Could he really still remember? Should he try? There was no one around to hear it if he tried…

"Whenever life gets you down,  
keeps you wearing a frown,  
and the gravy train has left you behind..."

He did not know why his mind, after so much time had passed, still clung to these lyrics, but it kind of excited him to see how much he could still remember

"If you ever get so low  
that you don't know which way to go  
come on and take a walk in my shoes  
Never worry 'bout a thing  
got the world on a string  
Cause I've got the cure for all of my blues"

He liked the way his voice echoed in the small space. If he tried he could actually make a fine tenor. He listened closely again, the only other sound in the room was the water dripping down. He had to make sure there was no one else when he had to start. Now! With a little more spirit for the verse

"I take a look at my enormous penis  
and my troubles start melting away, dua do  
I take a look at my enormous penis  
and the happy times are coming to stay-"

He heard the sound of the door to the arena. It was not the sound of it opening, but closing. Jaune cringed at the thought of somebody hearing him sing in the shower. Could he not at least have sung something appropriate and cool? Jaune listened very carefully, but there was nothing, until he heard bare footsteps on the tiled floor coming closer

"Is that you Jaune?"

"…Yeah, it's me Ren"

Then there was silence again. Ren entered the shower next to him, and then the sound of flushing water was doublet

"You know Jaune… I used to like comical songs too"

"Is that so?"

"Yeah…"

"hmm…"

"...I gotta sing and I dance

when I glance in my pants

and the feeling's like a sunshiney day... "

Ren started weary, soft and quiet, but he did a fine baritone. Jaune had not expected that, and was for a movement stunned by the secret talents his friend possessed, before joining in on the chorus

"I take a look at my enormous penis  
and my troubles start melting away

Dua do

Yeah I got great big amounts

in the place where it counts

and the feeling's like a sunshiney day...  
I take a look at my enormous penis  
and everything is going my way."

From Jaune's left a deep and powerful bass suddenly sounded with bravura and intensity. The boys had not heard anyone approaching, and a new awkward silence had broken out, but then the beautiful voice vent on. There was a virtuous scat solo where the stranger sung, flowing with vocals and vowels and then they went along as well

"Yeah I got great big amounts  
in the place where it counts  
and the feeling's like a sunshiney day...  
I take a look at my enormous penis  
and everything is going my way.

My trouser monster!  
Everything is going my way...  
My meat is murder!  
Everything is going my way...  
Because size does matter!

EVERYTHING is going my WAYYY!"

None of them had sparred anything on the last tone. Jaune felt it should be weird, but could not help himself to feel happy. He felt all of them had somehow gotten closer, even to the mysterious person next door. There were movements where Jaune thought he could recognise the deep bellow, but he dismissed it, it was impossible, it could not be him, he would never

Even though he had finished, Jaune waited in the shower. He wanted to see who it was with such a deep and powerful voice. He suspected Ren might be interested in the same, for he did not go out either. They waited for a few minutes before Jaune heard him turn the water off. Quickly he followed; he grabbed his towel and ran out to meet his new friend

Jaune and Ren were both equally very surprised to meet Ozpin on the other site. With his towel thrown over his shoulders, he made no attempt to cover himself, but just took another sip from the coffee cup he apparently brought with him everywhere

"That was truly a delightful experience. You two are both very talented young men, and I'll look forward to do this again sometime"

He disappeared into the locker room. Cardin appeared shortly afterwards in the doorframe, still fully dressed in his combat armor. He took his hands up around his mouth to form a megaphone

"GAYYYY"

* * *

An AU where Da Vinci's Notebook exist


End file.
